The time has come to put an end to Ted Richards' reign of terror over the electronic airways. For too long “Sydney’s Eddie” has been taking easy pot shots at his teammates while they stand defenseless at his cheap comments. Often witty but more often unfounded, Ted’s jibes are creating a divide in the change room and it’s time for an international intervention to stop his tyranny. 

As called upon by our media magnate Jonathon Monasso, I am hoping to provide a point of difference or rather, a legitimate literal perspective to cull Ted’s influence.  By remaining impartial and current I hope to encourage Ted to do the same. I will only stand for the truth when reporting and will do my best to stomp out the ‘mayonnaise’ added to the Richards Reports.

Let’s start with the most recent Richards Report. By taking excerpts from Ted’s article I will shed light on the ‘Karaoke dinner night’ by explaining how it really ‘went down.’

The Richards Report claims:

‘We sit and chat a bit about footy, but mostly all things non-football’

Translated: After reaching 5000+ followers on Twitter, Ted doesn’t talk to his teammates unless it’s about his 5000+ followers

The Richards Report claims: To determine who sang karaoke at the team dinner; ‘(A) Selection process was carried out…’

Translated: Ted threatened eight of us over dinner; if we didn’t sing - he would slander our names over Social Media.

The Richards Report claims: ‘The team dinner… took everyone out of their comfort zone’

Translated: Ted never left his comfort zone. Rather he sat autocratically in his chair, video taping every performer so that he could later use the incriminating evidence as material for his gain…

I hope these few instances have opened eyes to Ted’s intentions and more importantly, provided insight into the inner sanctum here at the Swans. While this edition of Open Pyke has lacked football content, I would like to assure readers that I will be back and will aim to provide a candid outlook on all things current in football and life.

Yours truly,

Mike Pyke

Have you got anything relevant in the football or news world you would like me to discuss? Send your queries to media@sydneyswans.com.au, and include your name and hometown and I’ll try and discuss them in my next blog.